Day (30-something).... Blown Away By a Stranger

I've been blown away by many things this month. Weight loss, 6 packs, total body transformations and each and every time I have loved it. Tonight however I was blown away and I was not happy Jan, not happy at all. Like usual allow me to take you on a journey and paint the entire picture.

Like two kids with ADHD unable to just sit at home and taper for the marathon this weekend we took ourselves off to the local swimming pool for a quick dip and some relaxation time. Since another local pool closed down recently, there are now twice as many bodies weeing in the same amount of water and more beady eyes on the squad teams also trying to work out if they are old enough to perve on yet. 

ANYWAY... One of the joys of this overly full facility or should I say WAS one of the FORMER joys is/was the Sauna. A nice hot room, silent and total chill time. I'm down with sitting half naked and sweaty in a small room with 6 people in it who I have only just met. I don't even care if I see dimpled bum cheeks, butt crack due to see through bathers, it's all good. But I'll tell you something I'm NOT down with my dear friends is my new sweaty naked friend DROPPING HIS GUTS in this small sweat sack of a room and in turn blowing me away! What self respecting person just openly lets one rip in such an awkward manner! Maybe he was simply being strategic and trying to clear the room??

While my dear running buddy was able to keep game face, I indeed lost my mind, cracked up laughing and could not stop. What made it even funnier was the disgusted look on the man sitting next to gary gut dropper stormed out in disgust. Now I know toilet humour isn't everyones cup of tea but this even had me killing myself and I guess you could say gasping for air.

A little off topic but I guess it's all part of the challenge hey! Anyhow, marathon this weekend and another cheat meal. I kind of feel like I have been cheating already though, having carbs and fruit etc in the lead up to the big run. I've got to the stage now though where I don't even want the cheat meal. There is nothing that I'm craving, and all I think about is that 'what's the point of taking a backwards step.' That said, if you put a chicken parma in front of me I'm sure it would be a different story. 

Day 32- Running like the Gingerbread Man

THIS WOULD HAVE MADE MORE SENSE IF PUBLISHED ON THURSDAY WHEN I WROTE IT!

This morning I went out for a solo run. The first 5km I was on fire, running like a pro, feeling amazing even broke my 5km record time, look out Steve Mon-spaghetti... Then I hit a hill and the mind demons kicked in. Once the mind demons get going its hard to stop.

• It's too hot to be running
• I should walk until I catch my breath
• I'm so thirsty, my legs hurt
• Someone carry me
• Winge, winge, winge

In trying to fly-kick the demons I started thinking about our little bootcamp team. Then it STOPPED and the positive thoughts started flowing in. I thought how inspired I was by my 8 week challenge buddies who are all kicking butt and motivating me every. single. day. Probably not even realising. I thought what great positive people I have in my life. How lucky I am to find this equally crazy group  who push and encourage me and have such an uplifting influence in my life. Then out came the massive bicep and the patting on the back began.

My first goal when I started bootcamp all those many moons ago was to run 1.6km, the fitness test, which I could not do. Actually, let's be honest my first ever goal sheet was filled in by my best friend. it read:

1. eat three hotdogs back to back and
2. do something that I wont say to someone who shall remain nameless.

Needless to say I never submitted that sheet.

But I just couldn't beleive that today I was beating myself up on that damn hill about 7km into it.  Now my goals are marathons, triathlons, tough mudder, 100km walks. What an improvement. But again, it's all credit to the people around me. Who make it FUN to get out of bed at 5:25am and run around like a headless chook.

And now that the heart rate has slowed down and I wiped away my sweat moustache it has CLICKED. One of my holistic approaches to this challenge has been transcendental meditation. And it's working!! Long story short, it teaches you to be happy without material things in your life. I try twice a day to be still for 20 mins and meditate. I'm so content with life and I think this has had a huge infulence on this. Don't worry though, I'm sure this hippy faze will wear off shortly and I'll be back to direct depositing my salary into Westfield and being about as material as Spotlight.

Happy Thursday Friends!

Oh and a quick stats summary. For those of you who are interested. My plumbing is officially on strike.

 

Day 31- Twinning with J Hawkins

Something a little bit shocking happened this morning. Come on the journey with me for 5 minutes (if you have better things to do like Shaun Micallef YouTube videos though I totes understand if you can't).

You know when your imagination paints a VERY clear picture of how something is going to be, look, feel, taste and then reality kicks you up the ass, with a heavy steal boot. Well, yes, I got a little love tap on the bot bot from reality this morning. It felt kind of like the period in time when I rocked around with Farrah Fawcett hair thinking my sh!t didn't stink, only to look back on pictures and think WTF... no seriously WTF was I thinking?!?! Your sh!t stunk and you looked like a hot mess.

So we are mid way through the craziness of the challenge and an email from up above (bootcamp head office, not jesus) suggested we take mid-way photos. Remember at the start of the challenge when my face was shock horror at the before pics. Well ladies and gentleman this cocky little number hit smug town WAY TO EARLY.

In my head there was an image going on of my mid way pics... looked something like this below, also these are the bathers I have spotted for this summer, back off they are mine. All women know that when you buy the bathers you will indeed look like the model who advertised the bathers. You can't blame me for thinking this though, it's common knowledge amongst us lady folk. With the 8 week challenge also came the promise of longer hair and the olive tan. Right? Half way through challenge roughly translates to top pic below. Right?

Don't worry I know what you are thinking, I thought it too. If you look closely you will be able to tell the difference. Jen Hawkins is the one on the beach. I'm pulling a selfie in the mirror with my iphone. Twins right?

WRONG! So freakin wrong.

And like the vain 20-something white girl that I am, I would like to add that this midway shot was AFTER my 5 gallon of fluid for breakfast. So yes, a little bit of progress but not what I had originally hoped for and a fair cry from the image in my head or JH rockin my bikini.

Reflection time maybe? And no not mirror reflection. Time to manage expectations perhaps? That 6 pack I ordered? OK so maybe it's not an express post delivery. Perhaps it's an out of stock item that I'm on a waiting list for and may take longer than the 8 weeks. But hell, I'm feeling great, still bossin' a positive attitude and seeing results in other areas. And let's face it. If my pics at the end of the 8 week challenge don't look like  J Hawkins pics, there is nothing a good 8 hour session on Photoshop wont fix. I've been practising already, just in case. Check out the spray tan, pedicure and abs. What do you think? Can't even tell right! 

More than happy to help out with other challengers pics if you get stuck just email them to me goddessofphotoshop@gmail.com

Cough Cough Day 26, 27, 28, 29 & 30.... OOPS!

Well Well Well... I think it's fair to say I dropped the bundle. Not just on the blogging front, but many things the past five days have become 2nd priority to pushups and watching Shaun Michallef YouTube videos. I'm currently living on a diet of eggs, defrosted 4 year old meat, weight watchers bacon and protein shakes as I haven't made it to the shops. I have no idea what's happening on the 8 week challenge plan and I'm 99% sure that my aforementioned diet is going to get old very quickly. Life is busy, if I find time to scratch my ass on a sunny Sunday afternoon without a laptop in my other hand, I'm punching air.

So to fill in the avid followers of the last 5 days. The noteworthy items include a cheat meal, half way point of the challenge and the addition of the dirty rotten combo.

Next on the agenda, throwing up the cheat meal. Hmmmm, just wait just wait. It was either due to car sickness, gastro, swine flu or perhaps ever so slight inebriation, can't quite work it out (that's my story...whatever). Such a fine example of my new found ways of not overendulging, well done I say old chap, well done! 

Just quietly, I totally get where the bulimia thing comes from, even though I was looking like a hungover coke whore Saturday morning, it was a skinny coke whore. All the enjoyment, without the calories. While I'm not condoning it, I get it. Must run that strategy by the bootcamp trainers...

Dear Sarge,

If I happen to vom up my cheat meal, can I go for seconds? 

Emma

Fair question, and don't judge... You've been there you filthy hipocrite. Probably just not stupid enough to publish it in a blog.

Shout out to my uni lecturer who gets to read this though! Bet none of your other students are so frank. Will shout outs get bonus marks? But really, all jokes aside. Pretty poor behaviour   and good to know the new rig is a two can Sam. Looks like my money saving plan has just kicked in too!

OK, serious now serious. We're over half way now!!!! 54% done, CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?!?! A few hurdles coming up though. In the next 4 weeks of challenge I need to move out of one house and into another, head interstate twice and run in a little event call the 42km Melbourne Marathon. JESUS! If I thought I was busy now then this storm is about to turn into a tornado!!

Ok so stats for the last 5 days. Let's just say I ate one of every animal, a dozen eggs, 13 tubs of yogurt and 25kg of protein powder. I've religiously stuck to the plan and have full intentions of kicking ass right way through the next 4 weeks. Bring it on!